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Monday, December 1, 2008

Worn Out


We had some fun at Thanksgiving, as you can see! :)

So back when I thought I was graduating for good in the Spring, I was really looking forward to being done with school. It has been said that college is the most "free" time of your life...which makes sense. There is no family responsibility, no mortgage payments, a day's schedule may only include 2 hours of class...but it's harder then it seems! Maybe now I sound like a naive young person, but I'm just sayin' what I feel :) Never truly being "finished" with a day of work because homework or studying always comes home with you gets to be draining. I am looking forward to the days when I can leave work at work and come home for the evening. So I'm not really sure sometimes why I signed up for another year of school! :) Don't get me wrong, School of Ministry has been awesome, challenging, super fun and so worth it, but right about now...that's right, finals time...I am wondering if I had a serious head injury right before I decided to sign up for another year. I seem to have completly lost all motivation, which really isn't me at all. I don't like this new side of me that I am discovering. It all started about 4 weeks ago when getting up at 6am got much harder to do. Now this is strange, I am a total morning person (after I've had my shower). But I was having to DRAG myself out of bed every morning. One day I just didn't even feel like going to school, so I didn't! I took a "Mental Health Day" which I actually have done for several years now (once a term, I took a day of for no real reason other than a day of rest, and I tried to choose the most busy day on my schedule as well). I couldn't figure out what my problem was. Then last week I had an epiphany. I was shutting down. Every day I get a firehose of information and wisdom shot at me. I count it a good day if I can catch onto a few droplets and tuck them away in my heart. Now I know that's the idea in a one year Bible program like I'm in, but seriously! I was not expecting it to this degree! I was hoping that Thanksgiving break (we were given the whole week off) would help this situation, but it seems to have only compounded the problem. Uh oh! As long as I make it through finals and get my Old Testament reading finished, I will be in a good place to leave for Brazil. I would love your prayers for this issue, and for a restful and refreshing Christmas break.

Speaking of prayers, here are a few ways you can pray for me and the team as we go to:
1. There are SO many details to finish before we leave, I'm trying to use all my time efficiently.
2. This is the first year I am leading the trip alone. Pray for boldness in authority and clarity in decision making.
3. That we would experience unity as a team and learn how to put each other above ourselves.
4. This trip is going to be a very busy one. Pray for effectiveness in our ministry opportunities as well as good times of rest.
Thank you so much for interceding for our team! I can't wait to share all the amazing things God will do on this trip when we return. Blessings as you enter the thick of the holiday season!

2 comments:

Sheri said...

You are not alone! As I talk with some of the other SOM students (and having had all of my children go through it!) your feelings are very natural at this point of the game. It is hard work!!!!! I don't think you'll really realize the fruit until it's all over. With that said...
rest your brain but get ready to use your heart as you travel to the great Brasil!!! (I would so love to be in that suitcase.) You will be in our prayers and we'll look forward to the day of hearing all about it.

rosepua said...

Ahhh, so THAT'S what's up. Interesting to me how God guides us to pray your requests before we hear them from you. We are committed to doing just that. Love you. MA